2 Corinthians chapter 3 verse 2 reads, “You yourselves are our letter, written on our hearts, known and read by everybody.”

It’s a letter from Paul to the Corinthian people where he states with confidence that the people themselves – changed lives – are the fruit of his ministry and the letter of commendation for his team.

Isn’t that a cool thought? Defining ministry success by changed lives?

I hurt when people leave Antioch because I wonder if we’ve failed them.  If programs, events or other distractions have kept us from ministering to them.  I have to remember no church ever kept 100% of its people.

It’s a good guide, however.  Are the people, rather than the programs, becoming the letter of commendation for our work?

Paul continued, “You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.”

I pray that our ministry may always be driven by the Spirit of the living God and that it may always reach to the level of human hearts.

I pray the church itself, the people, may be our letter.

My four year old, Sara, hopped in bed with us this morning. I love early morning cuddles and I love saying to my girls, “I love you.”

Sara, however, usually pushes back my I love you’s by saying, “You ALWAYS say that to me.”

This morning, I thought I would try a different route with the hopes she’d truly understand that I love her.  So, instead of saying it, I thought I’d define it.  I asked Sara if she knew what “love” meant and then told her, “It is the most ‘like’ there is.”  She only giggled, but I knew it had meant something.

I think we draw a distinction between like and love sometimes.  We know our parents love us – care for us, will provide for us, won’t leave us – but we’re not always secure they like us.

We often approach God the same way.  He loves me – he has to… he’s God.  He’ll probably accept me into heaven, he’ll probably forgive me of stuff, but I’m not always secure he likes me.

This lack of confidence that God likes us, values us, desires us is at the heart of much joyless Christianity.

Without delving too deep, I think we need to realize that love is the most “like” there is.

I’ve been thinking tonight about the difference between holy tension (tension over injustice and unrighteousness) and idealistic tension (tension over the gap between my expectations and reality.)

Both cause stress.  Both aim at a better reality.  Both extend beyond our realm of control and become subject of prayer.

One, however, seeks to align us with God’s view of imperfection and sin in the world. The other seeks to have perfection and maximize our desire for pleasure.  One looks through the lens of true love.  The other looks through the lens of self-love.  One seeks to give life away, while the other seeks to gain it.

There’s a lot of stress out there.  Often, we feel we have the majority share…

The question is, what lack, deficiency, problem or tension point are we going to focus on? The ones that stir up righteous passion or the ones that fuel self-pity.

I’m going to have tension in my life and I’m going to want to bring it to God in prayer. My hope is I’ll come before God fueled by holy tensions rather than idealistic tensions. I long for my fervor to match God’s.

This all reminds me of when I was a high schooler on a trip to Kenya to build youth buildings.

Our camp was out in a national park area and we had been dealing with army ants for days. These ants are huge, pinch like mad and can literally blanket the whole area.

One night, the ants found a way into the girls’ tent.  Around 3 a.m. they started screaming.

The whole camp came alive to try and help – except me. I somehow stayed in my bed and kept trying to fall back asleep. When I realized what had happened I hollered at a friend to “put ash in front of my tent door.”  These ants didn’t cross ash and it seemed logical to have someone put some in front of my tent.

Later I realized how ridiculous I had sounded to everyone else. While the others were trying to help hysterical girls with ants in their hair, their clothes, and their bags, I was thinking only of my comfort.

I ended up staying up all night after the others crowded into the remaining “ant free” tents to keep the fire alive and spread ash. It was my form of penance and attempt to appease my sense of shame for being so stupid.

This is kind of a picture for me.  How often do I ask God to spread ash in front of my tent? How often do I miss opportunities to unite with God in serving others, helping the vulnerable or giving to the needy because all I see is my own comfort?

Holy tension v. idealistic tension. May we be occupied with the first…

Find Rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. Psalm 62:5

I responded to a friend on the recent comments by commentator Glenn Beck on Social Justice.  Below is my text:

Glenn Beck has a narrow definition of Social Justice.  For him, it is political and liberal.  All of his examples make this clear.  Thus, his argument, from a philosophical perspective, goes like this:

1.  Social Justice is an abuse of power, borders on entitlement and is tainted with socialist ideology

2.  Instead of all that, Christ commanded us to love

3.  Therefore, Social Justice is not good and possibly quite bad and different from what Christ commanded

In contrast, the argument from many strong Christian leaders for Social Justice goes like this:

1.  Christ commanded us absolutely to love – indiscriminately, globally and holistically

2.  Social Justice basically means indiscriminate and holistic love in working clothes

3.  Therefore, Social Justice is near and dear to the heart of God

Put another way:

Glenn Beck: Social Justice >> political, liberal and a-theological >> bad and dangerous

Many others (and me): Social Justice >> love >> good and true

What I believe many of the younger Christian leaders understand better than many conservatives with a tight narrow definition of social justice is that in debates like this, that center around terminology, History and Etymology count way less than we are inclined to think.  Rather, how a word or phrase is “trending” at the current moment in culture is a much better gauge for what it actually “means.”

If we were debating the meaning of the word “gay” and someone took the meaning of the word from when he was a kid talking with his grandparents and then defended it with all the logic in the world – he’d still be wrong.  The cultural meaning of the word has changed.  Groovy was a cool word in the 70′s, but not now.  Social Justice was a negative concept to many from the 50′s to the 80′s, but to this generation it is a good word.  It’s not that we’ve changed our worldview completely on certain issues… it’s that the term has morphed culturally.  What it points to as well as whether it is a positive or negative term.

The bigger issue that is missed on the conservative side of this argument (one that you should recognize from your time growing up in the conservative circles) is that all the energy against Social Justice and related ideas does not add up to energy for love and peacemaking.  I can argue against a cult without ever arguing for Christianity… I can argue against Coca Cola without ever arguing for water.

The other side, however, is arguing for love.  The energy of many of my friends promoting Social Justice adds more to the “love” tank than the time and energy their antagonists add to the “love” tank.  You can see this by the two conclusions from the philosophical arguments above: one ends with a negation while the other ends with an affirmation.  This is more than semantic — it actually points energy in a direction.

It’s subtle, but it is why the conservative church went 50 years arguing against the Social Gospel before it realized that it hadn’t really argued for the many justice or love aspects on the periphery that Christ certainly would have had things to say about.

I’m an Independent.  I try to avoid falling wholly in either the conservative or liberal camp.  What I do know, however, is that many hate the term Social Justice because of what it might have meant decades ago or what it does mean today in political arenas.  I think this is where Glenn Beck is coming from. He means something by Social Justice that is highly political, liberal and debatable.

Most of the Christian leaders I know, however, use the phrase to talk about seemingly incontestable things like caring for orphans and widows, helping children in the third world who have AIDS, promoting economic and educational initiatives in developing countries, dealing with refugees, world hunger and the horror of modern-day human trafficking.

In this discussion, terminology, definitions and meaning are everything – in many instances, we’re all saying the same thing and promoting the broader categories of justice and love.

In the end, this is a classic debate where more heat can be added than light.  Starting with a talk show host at the center is probably not a good idea –

I’ve been in one of my pensive moods most of this week.  ”Pensive mood” is shorthand for contemplating the deep things of life and the human condition.

This morning in the second part of the Vine and the Branches series I tried to explain LOVE.  Nothing makes you feel weaker and more incomplete than holding up the ultimate standard.

Here are some thoughts that came to mind throughout the week:

Nothing makes you need love quicker than giving love.  Nothing makes my kids need a nap more than hours of full-tilt play.  Getting the love thing right, in some capacity, helps increase our dependency and need for Christ – just like the more I exhale the more I need to inhale.

Distance is foundational to our knowledge of and grace for others.  The greater the proximity from someone the more we’ll only see his or her personality. The closer the proximity the more we’ll see the person – just like the further I get from the Mona Lisa the more I focus on the frame and the shape.  The closer the proximity, the more I see the artistry, the contours and shading – in art as well as people.

Grace is tied to this deep understanding of people and their own unique circumstances and challenges.  There are two kinds of people in this world – those who judge people, like books, by their covers and those who judge people by their story.  Nobody is 100% good or 100% evil – we’re all an amalgam.  When we recognize our own complexities it is easier to have grace for the weaknesses and failings of others.  I once told Tamara that a person who disliked us and was attacking us was “not all bad” – just that the bad slice of their pie was facing us.  Grace comes from bird’s eye perspectives of people rather than reactions to slights, insults, failings or the like.

It is the nature of love to bind things together.  In a broken world, this means a lot of binding up, nurturing, patience, apologies and forgiveness.  The law, rules, bars of perfection, high expectations, impatience and judgment don’t really help.  Grace is the glue God gave to put this world – like Humpty Dumpty – back together again.  Christians without grace become mere commentators on brokenness.  Christians with grace become restoration artists putting pieces back together again – or, as Paul said, “ministers of reconciliation.”

Grace is a greased pig.  In trying to live out grace you can chase it, you can reach for it, you can understand it and you can grab it, but it is incredibly hard to hold on to for long.  We slide off quickly and often.  Knowing what grace is in our heads is a lot easier than living it out in our lives.

The Book of Proverbs says, A cheerful face is good medicine – satisfying to the soul.  Making someone smile, therefore, is giving good medicine.  If you want to heal the world, making someone smile is a good place to start.

Lastly, pensive moods make for weird thoughts and lengthy rambling sermons!!

Today is Tamara and my 10 Year Anniversary.

Anyone want to babysit?!

I’m not a big New Year’s Resolutions kind of guy.  My approach to life is kind of a “you have no idea what will happen next week” sort of thing.  You run hard at what God puts in front of you and you realize that plans, desires, opportunities, difficulties, money and time can all change.

That’s why most resolutions remain such… they are things we say when we are super motivated and reflective, but either aren’t realistically sustainable or accurate reflections of God’s will for our lives.

Having said that, I’ve been thinking about some resolution type ideas for the new year:

I’m going to work on getting out of meetings and conference calls that I don’t need to be in.  Half the meetings that I’m a part of are simply because I’m expected to be a part of them – not because I’m necessary.  I want to change that this year and buy back that time and energy to reinvest in more strategic areas of life.

I’m absolutely committed to reading again.  Don’t look for me to answer my phone or pick up an e-mail in the mornings.  Mornings are my most productive time and I plan to be using them for reading, praying and studying.

I’m going to try and give 80% of my time to leaders and seekers.  Leaders are my calling. Networking, brainstorming with, managing and mentoring leaders is not only my primary responsibility, but I’ve found it is the greatest investment of my time – it is my primary calling in ministry.

Seekers, those who are lost or confused and looking for God and answers, are a universal calling and responsibility for all pastors.  Jesus makes it clear that the one lost sheep is more important than the other ninety-nine who are healthy, safe and well fed (Mt 18).  Spending time with people who are wrestling with faith is a real passion of mine.  The irony in ministry, however, is that the group of ninety-nine are more assertive than the one seeker.  I’ve found that the safe and well fed sheep take up 80% of my time.  I’m really committed this year to shifting that percentage to the margins rather than the middle.  I’m going to try and give 80% of my time to leaders and seekers.  This means that I’ll have to say no to a lot of people and things and that I’ll have to refer a lot of people and things to others members of the Antioch staff – both things that I haven’t always been good at!!

I’m going to try and guard evenings at home and family time with the kids.  Unless it’s date night, a Kilns class or an elder meeting – I plan to be at home with the family.

Communication.  I don’t think most people know half of the amazing things going on right now in and through the Antioch community and I’d love to figure out how to up the communication so that we all get to enjoy the blessing!

There are some of my 2010 thoughts.  I’m really hoping to do a better job managing my time, which seems to get harder and harder the older the kids get!!

So, for the last couple of hours, I haven’t been able to get a couple of things out of my head about the Antioch community that I’m really proud of.

Thought that maybe if I wrote down some of the cool stuff I’d be able to clear my mind!!

Here’s a list:

• Financial giving at Antioch has been really amazing. What makes that so cool to me is that we haven’t even really talked about money. I really think that people want to give to what God is doing. Maybe when pastors goad the congregation about giving it actually takes the ownership away and makes it less fun for people to give??
• Brandon declared at staff meeting this week that he’s swamped with people wanting to help other families in the church (both through time and money) and that he can’t surface needs fast enough to keep up with the amount of people looking to give.  Have you ever heard of something like that?!?
• In the last couple of days we’ve heard from a married guy in Portland who decided to quit his job, move to Bend and work for us through World Relief NEXT for the next 6 months of his life; from a coffee shop owner who is willing to give his coffee shop to Antioch if someone is willing to run it; from a church in the midwest that has decided as a congregation to focus on helping churches in the Congo for the next 5 years because of what they’ve seen and heard through us (we’d never even met them before!); from a coffee distribution manager of a local coffee company who offered out of the blue to take care of all the coffee needs at the Kilns Bookstore; from a brand new family to Antioch who wants to help take care of our College pastor financially; and from a Christmas Tree lot that donated 20 trees to be given away to families in need.
• Mission Kids is getting ramped up for a relaunch with Linda (our Children’s Director) who is fired up to help parents teach their kids about compassion.  Mission Kids is something that the staff has been passionate about for a long time. Matt (our College and Missions Pastor) and Brandon (our Community Pastor) are both excited to be in the mix.  Stay tuned on this one!!
• Saw a really cool article in the Bend Bulletin yesterday from a local high school student that mentions Kilns College.  It’s amazing that a place like this exists where young people wrestle with questions of faith.
• I’ve been having conversations with several people who are now coming to Antioch because of the new Q&A Service. Several are staying for both services and are, in their words, “for the first time finding God.”
• There’s a conversation going amongst many of the professionals and artists I know about the concept of “giving your life away.”  I’ve never seen so many people willing to contribute, do pro bono work or volunteer.  It’s amazing… absolutely amazing to see people doing what they can to add fuel to the fire!!!!

Anyway, the list could go on and on.  I read Acts 2 to the staff this week and said that in the past decade I have read it a hundred times, taught on it a dozen times, but feel like I’m living in it now for the first time.

A pastor I met recently from another state shot me an e-mail this week to affirm Antioch and said, “you must be having the time of your life.”

I am…

We made a new friend, Jon Leyse from Crash 31 Media, this past week at the conference in Chicago. Jon traveled up from Indiana on his own time to shoot video for us.

It’s amazing meeting gifted people who donate their talents simply to give back to God.

Anyway, on Wednesday, the Church Engagement Director for the Africa Great Lakes region, Cyprian Nkiriyumwami, led everyone in prayer.  He began by reading Psalm 5 and then went on to interpret and explain it in an unbelievably simple yet powerful way.  The 45 minutes of prayer that followed was a once in a lifetime experience.

There was such a paradigm shift going on in my mind as I listened, that I decided to preach from Psalm 5 this Sunday and wanted to use a short clip of Cyprian’s intro.

Below is what Jon put together with only two days time and some Congo footage from the WR NEXT team’s visit to the Congo last year.

Amazing!!

(Make sure to watch this twice so you can really hear what Cyprian says…)

A Prayer For Congo from World Relief NEXT on Vimeo.

Been sitting on the Tarmac in Chicago for an hour and a half.

Found a WordPress app for the iPhone.

Matt tells me the Latin root for “patience” is “to suffer.”

I’ve been thinking through something this past week that I’ll probably put into a full message.

The main idea basically goes like this: there are people who call themselves Christians who are on an inevitable path to walk away from the church and God.

I call these people Terminal Christians.

In the past, when America was a much more culturally Christian nation, there was really no reason to give up church or Christianity – even if a person wasn’t really a believer (we’d say he “isn’t walking with the Lord right now…”)  A person who had no faith would simply live one way on Sundays and Holidays and a different way during the week. Hypocrisy was a coping mechanism.

In today’s culture, certainly in the Northwest, if someone doesn’t really believe in God and have a relationship with Him there is no reason to say you do and certainly no reason to attend church, which is seen as a patriarchal and hierarchical institution that uses people, abuses people and applies guilt as a means of controlling people’s moral lives.

Thus, when I see someone in the church who has no faith and is beginning to develop a critical view of church (essentially, adopt culture’s view of church) – I know I’m looking at a “Terminal Christian.”

Don’t get me wrong, if someone has a real faith then I believe that faith will continue to grow and develop.  What I’m talking about are people who have simply been a part of the herd, but will soon find their way out.  The frustrating part is that Terminal Christianity is exposing how many people in our churches have never really got it.

They have followed pastors or teachers and been entertained by programs and music, but they have never truly become disciples of Christ (what the word “Christian” is meant to imply).

Jesus said, “Seek and you will find.”  He meant to convey that our honest pursuit of God will be rewarded.

I’m realizing, from watching Terminal Christians, that the opposite is also true.  If someone is looking to find their way out of church and away from God… they’ll find plenty of excuses to leave.  You will find what you seek.

What does all this mean?

First, churches need to realize when we focus on external things we will reap what we have sown.  Somehow, the emphasis needs to be on faith, hearts, authenticity and people’s own relationship with God.  Great entertainment will only produce a great audience.  Discipleship, however, should produce committed followers of Christ.

Second, church leaders and mature believers need to actually look and be happy!  Drawing closer to God shouldn’t look like going to the dentist’s office. One of the main excuses people use to let themselves out of church is the stifling morality, the heavy burden of responsibility and their deep seated desire to find freedom and happiness. Hopefully, the irony is apparent. Both freedom and happiness are supposed to find their fullest expression in our close proximity to God and legalism and weightiness are aspects of religion that Jesus explicitly condemned. Instead of offering hope to those disillusioned with Christianity, we become their excuse.

Lastly, we need to raise our children differently.  (I could write pages on what I’m thinking and wrestling with on this one, but I’ll just leave it at this – if we raise our kids secular with a dash of Christianity, we shouldn’t be surprised when as college students their comfort zone is a cultural secularism and Christianity feels external and uncomfortable.)

I’m praying that people will once again find Christ, who is the hope of the world, in the local churches of their cities.

The new Q&A Service at Antioch starts December 6th!!

We’re calling it redux, which means “brought back” or “restored.”

The whole idea is to restore the conversation. Religion is at its best when people are free to ask questions.  It is at its worst when doubts, fears, questions, hang-ups, thought and issues are suppressed.

Jesus allowed questions.  The Inquisition was designed to suppress questions.

Martin Luther began the Reformation by nailing 95 issues (called “theses”) to a church door in Wittenberg, Germany in an attempt to dialogue with others about the Christian faith in hopes of returning to a more authentic New Testament expression.  His desire for dialogue was met with excommunication.

The mistake we often make is to believe that questions lead us further away from truth.  Therefore, questions are bad.

The truth is that questions can facilitate greater understanding that lead us closer to truth.  Therefore, questions – if answered in a way that leads to greater understanding, are good.

The Q&A Service is Antioch’s attempt to give church back to the people it was created for.  It is our attempt to bring back and restore permission for people to ask questions and wrestle with faith – thus the name redux.

The fun starts December 6th!!

Look out world… Ashlin is now walking!!

Tamara is reading through C.S. Lewis’s The Chronicle’s of Narnia and came across this passage that I marked years ago in The Magician’s Nephew.

We must go back a bit and explain what the whole scene had looked like from Uncle Andrew’s point of view.  It had not made at all the same impression on him as on the Cabby and the children.  For what you see and hear depends a good deal on where you are standing: it also depends on what sort of person you are.

What Lewis is talking about here is what philosophers call “perspectivalism.”  Put simply, our subjective experience or perspective is radically unique – regardless of seeing the same objective things as others.  In common conversation we say things like, “from my point of view,” or, “until you walk a mile in his shoes…” etc.

The book of Proverbs counsels us that “the first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him.”  It seems, however, that perspectivalism is often forgotten and neglected.  The less we introspect and the less we dialogue at a meaningful level in society, the more we forget that there are two sides to every story and that our point of view is hopelessly stilted to our own experience and perspective.

Insight, knowledge, wisdom and discernment help us understand perspectives.  Folly, ignorance, complacency and simplicity turn the grey hues into black and white categories.

Does this matter?

I think it is a matter of tremendous importance!

Spiritual dialogue and truth require the capacity to separate out or see our own heart, motives and lack of understanding.  Spiritual dialogue, in the prophet’s words and later echoed by Jesus, requires that we have eyes to see and ears to hear.  In short, it requires that we are able, in some small fashion, to see a reality outside the bubble of our perspective.

Lewis returns to this theme later in the Chronicle’s when Aslan, the figure of Christ personified in a Magnificent Lion, says, “But I cannot tell that to this old sinner, and I cannot comfort him either; he has made himself unable to hear my voice.  If I spoke to him, he would hear only growlings and roarings.  Oh Adam’s sons, how cleverly you defend yourselves against all that might do you good!”

My greatest fear for American Christianity and for Antioch, is that we have hidden ourselves in comfort and experience and will push back on anything – even truth, if it threatens to change the environment inside our cocoons.

Have we lost the capacity to see ourselves critically enough to realize when Reality is speaking?

Do we have eyes to see and ears to hear?

Do we have the stomach for the Prophet’s words?

(C.S. Lewis at his home, “The Kilns,” in Headington Quarry, England)

When I took two weeks to travel Europe several years ago, I really studied the D-Day invasions of June 6, 1944.  Part of the trip that Jon Lemke and I planned was to visit the Normandy beaches where the epic battles took place that signaled the coming end of WWII, and I wanted to know the full history.

It was Eisenhower who was in charge of the joint Allied forces, and the coming invasion of Europe was called Operation Overlord.  It was to be the largest amphibious assault in military history.  It involved an armada of 5,333 Allied vessels.

One of the interesting features of the invasion was the decision that Eisenhower had to make.  The seas were stormy and he had to decide during a 36-hour window whether to launch the invasion or postpone it until June 19. Launching on June 6th was better for the element of surprise and for troop morale, but waiting was better for weather conditions on the sea and in the sky (as many paratroopers were involved in the assault).

Eisenhower made the choice to launch the invasion on June 6. In a famous scene, Eisenhower signaled the invasion with a speech to the soldiers.

What many don’t know, is that he carried in his pocket during that speech a letter accepting full responsibility for the operation’s failure – should things go wrong.

I’ve been thinking about Eisenhower’s Letter today.

Are there risks that Christian leaders and pastors need to be taking?  Are we willing to put troops in play rather than continue to build up and risk nothing? More importantly, are we willing to accept responsibility if things don’t work out.  Do we carry with us a letter like Eisenhower’s?

My conclusion is that Eisenhower’s Letter and risk go hand in hand.  No risk – no letter.

Since leadership and responsibility are closely tied, maybe I can say, “No risk – no responsibility.”  Therefore, if responsibility - then risk.

It is easy to do what has always been done.  It is easy to huddle up.  But if leaders are going to take the responsibility to care for churches and lead them through current realities – there will be risk.  Turning the ship into the wave or leading people into the uncertainties of the future necessarily involves decision, commitment and risk.

I’m probably out on a ledge with this whole conversation, but I feel compelled to think about responsibility and risk.  If I don’t, it seems like I’ve abdicated leadership and am simply politicking.

(Here’s a picture of Eisenhower talking to paratroopers just prior to the D-Day invasion.)

Don’t know if anyone’s thought of this before or not, but Tamara just coined the word “Notivation.”

It means: No Motivation.

We’re behind on sleep around here… so, we’ve got “notivation!”

In honor of Antioch’s 3 Year Anniversary this Sunday, I thought I’d post some of my favorite videos from the past 3 years.

Micah’s song at the end of the this past summer -

The “Snow” Video from last Christmas Eve. Hilarious! -

The 2 Year Anniversary Video -

Behind the Music with Justin and Conor. Never get tired of it! -

The original Baptism at the Deschutes Video -

The Human Rights Series Video. Still one of the most meaningful seasons in my ministry life -

Antioch’s first video! It was made 2 months after the public launch and highlights the planting of Antioch. Still my favorite Antioch video -

Check out what Dorothy Sayers, a contemporary of C.S. Lewis, writes about the diminishing appreciation for literature in her time.

I couldn’t help thinking that the same line of reasoning could be applied to the decline of appreciation for “church” within the Christian community in our time.  It is amazing how we ride the tides of fashion.

What do you think?

Now, when a whole department of literature is thus unanimously and, as it were, automatically condemned for the mere crime of being itself, and excluded from serious critical attention, it is pretty safe to say that we have simply forgotten how to judge it.  It is extremely improbable, to say the least of it, that a genre that, in the past, produced such acknowledged masterpieces as The Divine Comedy, The Faerie Queene, and The Pilgrim’s Progress, is altogether worthless.  Neither is it probable that a genre that enjoyed so many hundreds of years of popularity corresponds to no fundamental need in human nature.  It is much more likely that we have fallen out of touch with it, so that we no longer remember how this particular literary game should be played—what its intention is or what its rules are—and thus are in no position to tell whether it is well or badly done, or what it is all about.  We are in the same situation as an American, who, not knowing the first thing about a cricket, is planked down in the pavilion at the Lord’s to watch a test match.  The only impression he is likely to carry away is that this is a slow and formal game, and not in the least like baseball.  He will have only a vague notion of what everybody is so earnestly trying to do, and the finer points of the play will escape him altogether.

Last Sunday at Antioch, Tim Kizziar underscored a point that I really like.

He was talking from the Book of Job about the nature of blessing God as a form of ‘approving of God.’  The converse was cursing God as a form of ‘disapproving of God.’

The interesting point, for me, comes in the relationship between proximity and our approval or disapproval of God. Closeness, friendship, trust and approval tend to come with closeness, nearness or intimacy with God.  Frustration, bitterness, anger and disapproval of God tend to come with separation and distance with God.

In short, distance and disapproval seem to go together.

I find this to be somewhat true of relationships in general.  Those close to me are forgiving, gracious and understand that I try to do my best even if I sometimes mess things up.  Those far from me tend to be unforgiving, ungracious and – because of distance, do not understand the complexities of my situation and merely react or disapprove of shortcomings and failings.

Isn’t this true in your life as well?  Don’t those close to you, your friends and family, provide a more forgiving net than strangers or the general public?

Distance and disapproval go together.

I found myself asking which drives the other… does distance lead to disapproval or does disapproval lead to distance?  The answer, I believe, is “yes.”  Both distance and disapproval can lead to the other.  Each, in its own way, can be the engine or the caboose.

If our desire, then, is to remain in a mature, healthy relationship with God and others, we can actively pursue it by either choosing to approve or choosing to approach.  Changing our mindset can lead to closer relationships.  I know this to be true.  If I accept someone for who they are – flaws and all, I naturally will end up closer to that person than if I don’t accept him.  Also, if I get close to someone, listen, try to learn, see the big picture, hear her heart and come to understand the reason for the flaws despite the intentions, I naturally end up more accepting of that person.

The bottom line, it seems to me, is that the burden of responsibility for relationships rests with me.  I can, if I choose, create the circumstances for relationship, community, grace, closeness and approval.

Maybe this is why the Great Command is for us to love God and love others – rather than be loved by God and be loved by others.  It is an active command.  It is obedience and work on our part.  It is choosing to draw close and seeking to understand.  Ultimately, it is an act of the will to move away from the starting point of distance and disapproval.  It is not passive.  It is my responsibility.

What gives us the strength to act on this?

Here is the irony.  What usually keeps us from acting – even setting itself up as justification for not acting, is distance and disapproval.

He’s not worth it. God failed me first.  That church isn’t relational.  She’s weird.  He’s a jerk. They’re not good Christians.  I don’t think they like me. Strange clothes, tattoos, funny clothes – it’s all very strange.  I just can’t get over what he did to me.  She is a threat.  God can’t possibly love me.  I pushed it all away because I am the victim.

Distance and disapproval fill the same driver’s seat that love needs to steer the car.

So, again, what gives us the strength to act on this?

Humility.  We’re imperfect too.

Practice.  People, like everything else, take practice.

Humor.  Many of the things we judge in others can just as easily be laughed at.  G.K. Chesterton said, “Angels fly because they take themselves lightly.”

Submission.  We have to love.  It’s what God commands… we have to obey even despite our petty grievances.

Encouragement.  This usually works best by giving some first.  It’ll come back around.

Scripture.  It lays our heart bare.  Change happens best when we’re not being defensive… scripture is hard to argue with.

Church.  What better place to practice grace than in a funky system with messed up, hypocritical people?

Saying sorry.  Our relationship with others stems from our relationship with God.  Our relationship with God stems from our ability to be honest.  We’ve lost the ability in American Christianity, I think, to say we’re sorry to God.  If we can’t ask forgiveness, we can’t be honest, we can’t sustain His fellowship and all is lost.  It’s no wonder that most biblical portraits of our relationship with God begin with the word repent.

Distance and Disapproval.  Do the opposite.

In Act II of Shakespeare’s The Tempest, Antonio says to Sabastian, “What’s past is prologue.”

I’ve been thinking of that for the last hour or so… what’s past – the trials the difficulties the struggles, are really just the beginning. They are the prologue. They are what the author writes to set the stage for the act to come.

In scripture, it is Joseph saying of the long drawn-out struggles of his life, “What you meant for bad, God meant for good.”  It is Job coming to a position of humble faith beneath a God bigger, grander and wiser than Job’s questions and frustrations.  It is the resurrection and the New Covenant charting a new course and opening up a new chapter following all that had come before – what’s past is prologue.

I once gave a talk that I called, “Between the Gardens.”  The central theme of the whole message was that we live ‘between the gardens’ – that is, between the first garden in Eden and the final garden in the Day to come.  Our season is the messy middle.  We aspire to, rather than live in, utopia.

In this chapter of the story, much of what we are called to is a call to suffer.  We know pain.  We experience brokenness.  We endure heartache, shame and loss.

We, like Antonio however, need to see this as simply setting the scene for the really great stuff.  We are living the prologue and the final drama dances on the horizon.  We know it by intuition.  We sense it by desire. We reach for it by necessity.

I’m sure my heart isn’t the only one that cries out for answers, quick fixes or heavy doses of “medication” to numb the pain.

Cheap answers and religious quick fixes don’t really work and leave me wanting something solid – hoping for bedrock.

The real challenge to faith is to grab hold of an Author who is far greater and wiser than us.  It is believing that the goal right now is not for the plot to resolve, but for the stage to be set.  It is feeding on hope rather than comfort.  It is trusting His reassuring words that beauty does come from ashes, darkness does turn to light and when we, as strangers, return to our heavenly home… what’s past will have been prologue.